once again, in no particular order...
1. This one is two-fold. It has to deal with animals. I love animals, don't get me wrong. What I dislike is: a) When people think it is funny to use people's voices to express an animal's supposed opinion in commercials for animal products. For example, the IAMS commercials. Dogs don't talk. We all know that. It's not funny or cute when you place a voice with an animal. Really; get a life. b) When people dress up their animals, take pictures of them, then place those photos online with stupid little captions. For example, check this website out Stupid Cats Or like when the people submit the videos of their squirrels water skiing with stupid little helmets.
2. I dislike it when, in local company commercials, the children are featured speakers. Here's a newsflash: children don't possess the proper vocalics - voice intonation, assertive voice, timing or any other effective delivery approach. What that means to me: It annoys the living crap out of me. Your child(ren) are not cute. They are not entertaining. Their shrill voices hammer and drone with great stiletto force into the nether-regions of my cranial cavity. Half the time you can't even understand what the kids are saying because they are either laughing or two blinks shy of being completely retarded. Kids, I can deal with. But don't put them in your commercials. If you do, and I find out where you live, I will dedicate every night for the rest of my life to urinating inside your mailbox.
3. If you really want to ruffle my feathers, then use the term "Livin' the dream" when asked how they are doing. Example:
-Hey, Joe. How's it going?
-Just livin' the dream, Gary. Just another day in paradise.
NOBODY in their right mind is that happy with their job. Even Mary Poppins wasn't that happy. Just a spoonful of sugar my ass. A spoonful of sugar to chase the fifth of whiskey she had to drink each night in order to sleep. Plus, livin the dream just sounds so absurdly gay. Not gay in a homosexual sense, but more so the social adaptation of it meaning stupid, pathetic, lame or any other derogatory connotation. Some guy said it to me the other day. He worked at the burger stand. If his dreams equate to no more than plugging his facial pores with airborne particles of grease and unsanitary minutia so his one zit can soon have many, many friends, then he may as well join the military.
For today, these are things I dislike.
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