New York: Day 1

I am taking you back in time to get a run through my trip. I left my camera in my friend's suitcase, so when I receive it I will post pictures in their respective positions. Until then, shut up.

Day 1, March 25.

We arrive at JFK at 10:30am local time. We left San Francisco at 12:30 PST Tuesday morning and had an hour layover in Minneapolis, which sucked. During those two flights, I was awarded no more than 15 minutes of sleep. The plane was freezing, I didn't have a blanket or pillow, and the old Chinese man seated next to me reeked of hamster droppings and curry.

But we (AJ and myself) arrived safely, so that's to be appreciated. After the hour-long train/subway combination to get to our friend Noora's house, we shower and meet Noora and Sarah for lunch at Lucky Strike in Soho. When they first described the place, I noticed some new terminology I needed to pick up on. "This place is kind of trendy," they both said.

Trendy, hmm? I put it aside and carried on. My lunch is pretty good. It's a $13 turkey burger cushioned not by a traditional bun, but by an English muffin. I can't tell if that was trendy or if the brick interior fashioned to look antiquated was the trendy aspect. Either way, I eat the burger and continue on. After lunch the girls have to get back to work, so AJ and I meander about the streets to immerse ourselves in the New York culture.

Note: If you want to seem like a local and not a tourist, be sure to wear designer jeans, designer shoes and preferably a pea coat, not the same Levi's you've worn for 5 days straight and a hoodie. First mistake.

As we peruse we encounter a man on his cell phone at a crosswalk. He gives a brief look in our direction and immediately turns around.
me: This guy looks just like Mike Myers.
aj: Yeah, I guess he kinda does.
The light is still red.
me: Dude, I really think that's Mike Myers.

Just then, the man turns around. He gives a look just like this:

Mike Myers stared me in the eye, no more than 8 inches from me. It was in that instant, when I shared the same breath of the man who married an axe murderer, he immediately walks across the street, never to be seen from us again. I think that is a great way to start off our trip.

Our next stop is the ferry to the Statue of Liberty, but we arrive too late. So we meander the streets, tourist map in hand, looking for Ground Zero. Some 20 minutes later we come across a site which looked to be a large skyscraper construction project. So, doing what we think noble and responsible, we ask a local police officer around the corner where we could find Ground Zero. He tells us to walk three blocks east, hang a right, turn left at the stoplight and go down a couple blocks. "You can't miss it," he says. So we do as we were told, but that lands us at a church with a graveyard. So, being the gentleman I am, I find the first attractive lady I can and ask her where to go. She is from Poland, and very attractive, and takes us to Ground Zero, as her office is near by. Presumably, this was the site we originally landed at. It's a wonder people don't like cops...

Anyhow, our next stop is the Empire State building. Ignorant as I am, I don't imagine much of a line to get to the top. I mean, who else in their right ming would want to see such a landmark? We stand in line for 1 hour and 45 minutes. When we reached the top, we spend about 7 minutes walking around looking at the massive city of which we are now a part, wind chill cutting right to the bone, and I look over the edge. I am afraid of heights and decide that if I were to commit suicide, I couldn't do it there. I think I would die of a heart attack from the fear of being so high before I could even make the leap. I hear a man with a New York accent tell his kids, "Yeah, those stupids that jump off'a he'e don't e'en do it right. The wind's sooo strowng that it'll blow ya right back into the buildin' before you even reach the bottom."

The kids are fascinated. I feel nauseated. We leave.

On the way down, which takes another 20 minutes, AJ and I discuss how many bodies must be buried in the cement from the fallen laborers.
aj: Yeah, back then tere weren't as many Mexican immigrants. They were probably those Irish Mics I hear about.
Note: AJ is of Irish descent, and I know this was a joke. So you should too.

As he says this though, an elderly couple in front of us turns around with an indistinguishable smile. Turns out, they are English and thought the joke was funny. Always a clash between those two countries...I love every minute of it.

Our next venture is to Little Italy, which is rather disappointing. Chinatown is completely taking over, and the few remains of Little Italy consume no more than a couple blocks of tourist shops and a few restaurants. Having not eaten for seven or so hours, we go to the first place we see, looking for some New York pizza. It is Frankie Cee's. The pizza is terrible, the service is worse. We walk around a little more, by this time it is 8:00 so we walk to Schiller's to meet the girls, and some more girls, for dinner.

Upon arrival, we are once again told that Schiller's is chill, kick-back and trendy. It's also so New York.

Even though we have reservations for 9:00 we aren't seated until 9:45. The place is kind of cool looking, I guess, but loud as fuck. People everywhere, loud music. The only saving grace is alcohol, which we consumed a good amount of. After an hour at Schiller's, we go to a wine and beer bar, with nothing but a bunch of, pardon the term, douchebag guys. We have a beer and leave.

Note: I was under the impression we were going back to the girl's house to change before dinner, so I am still wearing my backpack full of cameras and maps. A little uncomfortable when going out.

We make our way to a third bar, don't know the name, and honestly don't care to remember. More douchebag guys and uppity girls. And I am still wearing a backpack. We stay for a small while, then go to Noora's to get some much needed shut-eye.

This was day 1 of my trip.